gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
He appeared on my 7th floor fire escape and sang to me and jimmy through the window when we fucked. He's like a drunken mix of Sinatra and Spiderman.
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
New level of stoned. My Terry's Chocolate Orange didn't 'whack-and-unwrap' so I ate it like an apple.
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
Did I tell you about my dream that I got handed a $100 and my vagina dissolved it? I think it wants me to not be a whore anymore.
So I just accidentally joined a bar crawl and got a free shotski of Jameson. I love life.
Randomize
