On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
This lady in my dui class just asked what patron was. I feel like she doesn't belong here
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
If the EMT's ask later... I had 5 hour energy for breakfast and Four Loko for dinner... It might be important for them to know that
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
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