This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
I just woke up in my car with half the wedding cake next to me. This will not end well.
The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
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throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
Since you're going to wake up and see one bajillion missed calls from me, I just want you to know that's a perfectly reasonable number. Now come downystairs.
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
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