She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
Got pulled over today for going 90 in a 40 zone with my leg out of the window. Still got out of the ticket. I'm getting way too good at this. Wanna trade bodies so we can see if it's my boobs or my charm?
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