question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
I come back upstairs and there he was sitting in a speedo. He handed me a blanket and said "let's cuddle" how is this real life?
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
I'm fucking a man old enough to be my father who is also dating my boss. What have you done with your life?
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
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