She's in the bathroom crying cuz she can't get the condom out of her giner. Do you have tongs?
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
Am I texting you while being used as a stripper pole by two half-naked women? hint: I am.
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
I’m going to hump him until his teeth hurt and then I’m going to have my way with him
Randomize
