just heard the best thing ever: calling people's kids "fuck trophies"
Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration.
I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
Do you think there's anyone left in this world that hasn't masturbated in a computer chair?
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
Welp... sober this am and I still have a parrot.
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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