I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
Last night I was introduced as the Picasso of getting fucked up so I obviously had to live up to it by chugging long islands
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
Randomize
