That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
I tried to put a seat belt on in the shower. And I'm 80% sure I ate soap.
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
I don't know how Dave is alive, I feel like he's been drinking since I met him.
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
Everyone I slept with in 2016 is getting a Christmas card from me. Because I'm an adult.
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
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