3:12 am: but i thought i was coming over tonight, don't fall asleep i wore new underwear
Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
They're the one who can profit the most when given the opportunity for blackmail.
At least that's how I've always seen it whenever I've been the Designated Driver.
That simultaneously explains everything and makes me very very terrified of you.
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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