we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
I walked in on him cutting a hole in the condom.
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
He sent me a 2am email the just said "Ping". Nerdiest booty call ever.
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
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