somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
I feel like death gave me a hand job
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
He came when Ron Burgundy started playing the jazz flute. How do you think it went?
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
I got propositioned while wearing the bottom half of a horse costume. It's like god is apologizing to me in the strangest of ways.
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
Randomize
