your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
Happy hour is for amateurs. Been drunk since 1230. Fell asleep in a disney viewing of UP. Went to the roosevelt and drank more. Now im stumbling around the grove.
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
I always knew I would be boring and die in an Uber.
Fuck you. Fuck this party. I just wanted to be pretty with a cute little tiara and boys sucking my tits, now i have a hangman game drawn on my face and jello shots in my hair.
I wanted to give you a great birthday party. You know I did.
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