Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
I just puked in an auto zone parking lot. I'm never eating peanut butter and red wine for dinner again.
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
Today's walk of shame includes last nights hair and make up, an 8 hour shift, me leading a meeting and me throwing up in a parking lot on my way to work. Dear world, you're welcome.
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
Randomize
