i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
you called me at 4 in the morning and invited me over for pasta and a late night viewing of titanic.
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
Randomize
