Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
We are two peas in an std pod
On the bright side his mom approves of me. Though it's apparently because she sleeps with married men and has a soft spot for "fellow homewreckers"
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
I just want to let you know that when you try and lie about the "solid 10" you brought home last night, I've got a picture of her and about 10 reasons you should have left her at the bar starting with those martin scorsese eyebrows.
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
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