David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
woke up this morning with a pool of champagne in my purse. apparently i was saving it for later.
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
I just called my mom 'Napoleon bronaparte'. I need to stop hanging out with you.
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
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