im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
I just wanted to say sorry for trying to jack off your dog last night.
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
Saw someone get laid in the bathroom no one was wearing shoes and I had a parrot on my shoulder...I never want to leave this bar
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
Just found dollar bills in my sheets. What part of the weekend am I forgetting?
Literally the only clue I have to try and figure out my blackout adventures is a draft on twitter that just says "Mummies alive!"
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
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