I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
Don't EVER smell your tampon
you told grandpa to call you daddy
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Today is definitely a "stand over the toilet and pee through the opening at the bottom of my boxers" kind of day.
I guess the silver lining is that having a big dick really comes in handy when you're hungover.
It's a mixed blessing.
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
I see more hoeing in ur future
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