so explain again why im purple
no
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
Just threw up at the table during our Father's Day dinner. And I managed to get quite a bit on dad, so that was nice.
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
Barsexuality is the new black.
My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
I have a cup of vodka in my bathroom with a straw in it. Yes, I am ready for this bikini wax.
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
You know something is wrong with your life when your mom is at the bar getting free tequila shots and you aren't
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
I just thought I should tell you that I always know what you are doing. Everywhere. Every time. -Your loving Mother
Randomize
