I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed.
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
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