Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
You got in the cab and told the cab driver "we only have seven bucks so you better drive fucking fast".
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
Okay so I'm high eating chili cheese fries bra-less watching Mulan, could I be doing any better at life right now?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"You're the only girl I haven't made out with yet" = worst pick up line ever
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
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