I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
Well I'm 2 for 2 with the absinthe, I just woke up in some random car behind the bar
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
She said I'm like warm bathroom-sink water. There's nothing necessarily wrong with me, but she doesn't exactly want to "drink me in"
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
Randomize
