I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
Just so you know, each of my boobs fits perfectly in a martini glass.
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
I am available for nakedness
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
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