Texts From Last Night

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  (613): View more from Ontario

  Sorry, I don't speak sober.

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  (613): Sorry, I don't speak sober. http://tfl.nu/dwuu
  Replies (8) Good night (4214) Bad night (668)
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  (949): View more from California

  we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds

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  (949): we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds http://tfl.nu/xoyy
  Replies (12) Good night (649) Bad night (3166)
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  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night

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  (202): i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night http://tfl.nu/pk50
  Replies (13) Good night (4790) Bad night (747)
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  (860): View more from Connecticut

  when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.

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  (860): when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage. http://tfl.nu/ckot
  Replies (212) Good night (856) Bad night (10597)
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  (214): View more from Texas

  I am sitting on the floor by my oven watching my cookie dough blossom. This is a whole new level of fat

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  (214): I am sitting on the floor by my oven watching my cookie dough blossom. This is a whole new level of fat http://tfl.nu/a753
  Replies (18) Good night (5431) Bad night (2807)
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  (952): View more from Minnesota

  You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear

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  (952): You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear http://tfl.nu/fvq9
  Replies (10) Good night (2243) Bad night (3792)
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  (917): View more from New York City

  My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.

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  (917): My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table. http://tfl.nu/qx0a
  Replies (4) Good night (4074) Bad night (859)
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  (850): View more from Florida

  And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.

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  (850): And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will. http://tfl.nu/iz1b
  Replies (18) Good night (3147) Bad night (974)
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  (937): View more from Ohio

  A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.

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  (937): A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining. http://tfl.nu/4mc3
  Replies (16) Good night (2758) Bad night (917)
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  (520): View more from Arizona

  Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes

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  (520): Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes http://tfl.nu/y839
  Replies (3) Good night (1454) Bad night (728)
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  (702): View more from Nevada

  If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.

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  (702): If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak. http://tfl.nu/8cng
  Replies (7) Good night (1486) Bad night (482)
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  (719): View more from Colorado

  She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.

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  (719): She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment. http://tfl.nu/ge6f
  Replies (3) Good night (465) Bad night (727)
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  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.

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  (+44): I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever. http://tfl.nu/7r8h
  Replies (2) Good night (989) Bad night (332)
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  (719): View more from Colorado

  I told her the party couldn't handle my playlist LAZERBAWLS and I was right. Cops in the basement, orgy in the kitchen, jousting in the living room.

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  (719): I told her the party couldn't handle my playlist LAZERBAWLS and I was right. Cops in the basement, orgy in the kitchen, jousting in the living room. http://tfl.nu/d9w2
  Replies (6) Good night (1829) Bad night (394)
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  (619): View more from California

  Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.

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  (619): Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman. http://tfl.nu/nljs
  Replies (5) Good night (348) Bad night (730)

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