Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(407): View more from Florida

So I'm playing pool in my cowboy boots and some guy came up looks at my boots and goes, "you should've got the boots with the fur"

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(613): View more from Ontario

His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that

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(804): View more from Virginia

Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.

(1-804): View more from Virginia

U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha

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(706): View more from Georgia

Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.

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23 Men Confess The Moment They Realized They Wanted A Divorce
Read it at the TFLN blog
(515): View more from Iowa

John Mayer's mother should have swallowed him when she had the chance.

(1-515): View more from Iowa

As in blowjob or cannibalism?

(515): View more from Iowa

I was thinking blowjob, but either would've been a better idea than giving him a record deal.

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(703): View more from Virginia

So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win

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(201): View more from New Jersey

Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.

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(570): View more from Pennsylvania

So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.

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(646): View more from New York

I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.

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