The cop didn't care that I was peeing on the wall of my dorm building... All he said was, "come on, it's 9am."
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
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