That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
At the gym and this really hot trainer checked me out and was talking to his buddy about his workout. He then says "yeah man, like I'm doing so many reps- what's 7 times 7, 45?"
He was THIS close.
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
Came so hard my ears popped. This lovely piece of news and pissin in my driveway brought to you by rum
We watched the first ever season of SNL and fucked for so long. He accidentally punched me in the face, but I mean, John Belushi was the background noise of our sex. I can deal with it.
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
he just fucked me for my cheese.
I forgot wine drunk hurts
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
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