A little girl and i are having a face making battle in mcdonalds
She started it, but I totally finished it.
I woke up this morning and was hoping we drank enough last night to have a unicorn drawn on my wrist. Good News: We did.
Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
You dont lie about slip and slides
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
Randomize
