508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
well that one time I was being a total idiot trying to see how much I could drink. turns out 22 shots is too much. surprise surprise! ambulance party!
He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
Randomize
