You know its bad when you're praying for a hangover just so you aren't still drunk at work anymore.
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
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do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
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Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
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