I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
Pro tip: Don't start playing Bejeweled on Facebook while waiting for your Adderall to kick in. Unless you have the next 9 hours free.
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
You kept telling everyone that you were as sober as a camel. I have yet to figure out what that means
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