his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
She wasnt impressed wen i brought a guy for her back with me, a 3am impromptu sperm donor is not a gd birthday present. Im a bad gf.
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
I threw a dessert topping at a baby tonight so drink up! If you stay sober tonight I will be very disappointed in you.
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
Someone stole a lamp last night.
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
I wrote myself a note last night telling me to tell you that you're the best person ever, and asking you not to tell me what I did, I think I'm trusting my drunk judgment on that one.
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
Randomize
