Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
I hope my orgasm sounds aren't secretly that bad and no one tells me
How does this dude know what a dying walrus sounds like? That's the real question
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
So I woke up this morning to find my laptop open, with a google search for "where to buy marble", and a hungover naked northern girl in my bed who told me that I claimed to be a sculptor last night and that I promised to sculpt a bust of her hands...
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
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