it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
Building a door into the garage so when I bring girls home my mom doesn't wake up.
Pathetic yet considerate
He pulled over in the Compass Bank parking lot so I could dry-heave, but I decided I couldn't vomit there because "I bank here."
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