I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
just cuz theres a goalie doesnt mean i cant commandeer the goal and become a way better goalie
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
Wait... why were you finger painting at one in the morning?
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
Randomize
