Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
Want me to give your number to an army recruiter?
I don't know... do you want me to use your number to sell used gay porn on Craigslist?
I sense beginning a prank war would end badly for both of us.
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
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