I think i peed on brittanys purse
how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
DRUNK COOKIES
Are you drunk or are the cookies drunk or are these cookies that get you drunk?
Yes
Randomize
