Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
I wanted to get all my legit stuff out, but then I decided I didn't trust drunk me with my own things
Good decision.
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
Randomize
