i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
I've never seen the starbucks guy more terrified than when you dove out the car window after your credit card
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
Get up, biotch, before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spoon you have going on between the two of you and your dog.
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
I should probably just LinkedIn request everyone I've ever slept with so they stop popping up on my suggested connections list
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
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