I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
We interrupt your regularly scheduled Saturday morning programming with this important announcement: you are not the father. I repeat not the father. Congratulations and have a nice day.
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
Steven and I talked about running for office again today. It's fucked that my 3 dream jobs are marijuana bakery owner, bar owner, and president.
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
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