your thong is hanging out like whoa
I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
We were having an argument with his friends mom about whether it was worse that he bootycalled me at 4 a.m. or that I bootycalled him at 12 in the afternoon
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
I told the bartender that his red, white and blue shots were terrible and tasted like Thomas Jefferson's balls.
Leave it to me to pull up my boyfriend’s grandfather’s obituary just to find out the name of his sister.
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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