I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
So then the officer asked you how you were getting home and you told him "very carefully"
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
Randomize
