Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
Casually had to file a missing persons report last night
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
Randomize
