is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
Happiness is watching your asshole boss' police DUI video.
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
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