I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
Pretty sure they aren't letting me back to karaoke night after I screamed "fuck every one of you tasteless hillbillies!!" because I felt they didn't clap loud enough for Jen.
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
Randomize
