Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
never try to heat up a hot pocket in the dryer if ur microwave breaks...bad idea.
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
Today the house voted to defund Planned Parenthood but to continue funding NASCAR. I fucking hate everything.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
So I took a screenshot of my boarding pass and the TSA agent somehow swiped it to the next photo. Yep...TSA saw my dick before I even went through the body scanner.
Randomize