she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
How was the picnic?
We played softball, except our team sucked. In one hand was a mitt, the other a beer.
Why didn't you put them down?
No beer left behind.
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
dude pick up your phone
i cant. im high and theres a wild turkey in my backyard. wouldnt miss this moment for anything
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
Randomize