Having your wife answer your cell was so lame. Maybe we can talk when you get your phone, your facebook account, and your balls back.
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
You're cordially invited to the love nest for alcoholic and aquatic adventures. Also known as an all expense paid trip to my pool, alcohol, and vagina.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
did you just send me my own nude
We got signed out of jail by an Uber driver. I think that qualifies as a great first night of college
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Randomize
