Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
Walking down the street at 11 pm dressed in bubble wrap. Why is the bar so fucking far away??
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
The morning after your company Xmas party and that moment you're eating a block of cheese in bed wearing a sequin blazer and recalling all the details of your one night stand with a coworker who happened to start that day...fuck.
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
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