You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
sorry i got drunk at sunday brunch and force fed carrot sticks to your cat
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
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