Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
