Where is the hickey?
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
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